Look for the Helpers

I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who got into the mental health field for the wrong reasons. We all come out of grad school wide-eyed and ready to change the world for the better. But if you work in healthcare long enough, you start to realize that not every organization or system shares that same mission. Some are ruthless, unethical, and deceitful. It’s a harsh truth—one I know is not unique to this field.

I was lucky during undergrad to be surrounded by mentors who truly led with integrity. They taught us to advocate fiercely for our clients, to stand up when it mattered most, and to never forget why we got into this work. These mentors were the people I aspired to emulate as I shaped my professional identity. At the time, I was naïve enough to believe their values and approach were the standard across the field. Grad school taught me theory and evidence-based practices, but undergrad is where I built the foundation of who I wanted to be as a clinician.

Over time, it’s been difficult to watch myself—and many of my peers—get worn down by the bureaucracy that’s taken over so much of healthcare. I’ve seen good people, passionate clinicians, slowly lose the spark that once fueled them. It’s heartbreaking. We shrink our worlds, trying to hold on to what little control we have over treatment, over outcomes, and sometimes, even over how we show up for our clients. We get desensitized to all that happens behind closed doors and instead focus on what we can control: ourselves, and how we practice in those sacred moments with the people we serve.

If you know me well, you know I’ve spent the last few years battling systems whose values did not align with mine. It was exhausting. At times, I questioned whether I even belonged in this field anymore. Then, earlier this year, one of my mentors—also a dear friend—passed away unexpectedly. When I heard the news, I felt such shame that it had been years since we last connected. She helped shape the core of who I am as a therapist, and I’m not sure I ever truly told her how much of an impact she had on me.

So this week, I made a point to reach back out. I had coffee with another incredible mentor from that same era of my life—someone who was equally foundational in my journey. Leslie is the very definition of an advocate. An advocate for all, but especially for those whose voices are often unheard. She’s someone who doesn’t just talk the talk—she’s walked it in every facet of her life. Sitting with her reminded me that there are still good people in this field. It reminded me that while I may not belong in those large, broken systems… I do belong here. In my Counseling by Kristin era. Doing the work I fell in love with all those years ago.

So thank you, Leslie. For the coffee, the conversation, and the reminder that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. Your values, your heart, and your advocacy are what this field needs more of—and what I needed to see again. You exemplify what it means to be a true helper.